I dream dreams. Some are just nonsense and you process your experiences. But sometimes my mind understands more than my regular thinking, my dreams process my minds experiences. I understand more through my dreams sometimes. I had such a dream the other day. I knew the experience I have had such experiences before in life. So I knew it was my mind processing things I don’t collect, but my mind does. It knows things before I do. In my dream my boss told me I could go home, as if I wanted to. But really it wasn’t if I wanted to. They only tried to make it sound nice in the dream, but I knew there really was no option. So I told my sibling I had a dream and I felt it was a so-called true dream. Now today, I think it is a true dream, considering I found the ad. My partner thinks it is an old ad. That means they have had it out for a long time now. Interesting. They where never gonna give me a year, where they? They just couldn’t find someone for autumn, so they chose me. They had no one else.I recognoise this behavior, I experienced it before.
The kids miss their regular teacher, that they had before. I am not her, I will never be. She hugged the kids, I don’t ever touch the kids. I want no body contact with the students. I can therefore never be her. I dont have her experience either, I am newly out of school… This position demands you teach nine classes with 30 students in each class. They only get this subject half a school year. So in a year it is double amount of kids. That is a lot. Most teachers only have four classes compared to me. So it is a lot and also, I only have them one semester, half a year. Usually you have the kids one year. In the other job I don’t know how many I would have thought. But we would have been two teacher’s with a full class in the class room. Never alone. Easier. Safer.
It is dangerous to teach alone. You cannot trust the students to behave. Many students can be cruel. It is a cruel world out there.
I have been kind. I always am. But I follow the book and follow the rules. Not everybody out there likes the rules.