So yet another day went by. Waiting for good, waiting for bad, just being in the moment as well. Years go by and suddenly there is so little time left to do all you set out to do. So what ripples did you make today? What oceans did you set in motion? What collisions did you make?
My friends are still on with their divorce. I love them both and they cannot talk to each other, even though they known each other for almost three decades. Imagine that. A lot of kids and then they cannot talk during the process of divorce and separation… Very strange. My parents couldn’t either, but that I do understand better. My friends are cruel to each other and I try to tell the other of the two to be nice, even though the other one is cruel. They need to, since they have kids. Very strange how their marriage is falling apart.
If I divorce I have a child to consider. It will be in the center and we have to corporate. We also have assets and loans that would need to be equally distributed between us. I already did own a lot of stuff before we married, so I think I get most of the stuff due to that, but I don’t want the sofa or our bed or the kids bed. I know what I want. I take the car and my old furniture. Don’t care about more than 3 pieces of the new. Our home isn’t so big, so there isn’t to much stuff to pass around between us. Well. If I move to my hometown and my partner surely doesn’t want to, the kid has to decide who to live with during the weeks. The other would get the weekends, since it wouldn’t work any other way with school and so. The kid cannot go to a different school every second week… not optimal. I don’t even know if it is possible, if they allow it? Perhaps they would, I would choose a school of the same type. They have a lot in common and follow a special program. Perhaps it would work. Well. We would have to sell, I don’t think my partner makes enough money to get a full house loan. Perhaps it will have a better income within a year… who knows? I don’t. It would be easier if it could just buy me out from the house, if I chose to divorce.
I really want to move, I never enjoyed this town. Never ever. I was forced here since there where no jobs in my hometown. I ended up here, where the costume never fit me. So in this state I’ve been for far to long. I would go back for a permanent job with a good pay and a nice house. A really nice house. In the beginning, before my partner got this new job a couple of years ago my partner would have moved back if I got a permanent job. But now it says I have to commute. I won’t. I don’t want to go here. I don’t wanna live in Stockholm. I don’t like the stress. The bad traffic situation, the distances between places. Not having that many friends here. Most of all, I cannot get my own house here, I have to low income for the houses here. They cost about 6 million and even more… who has that kind of money? We cannot even lend that money, even less pay such a loan. I also would want to live in a okay neighbourhood. Having a ocean view… that is possible in my hometown. With a teacher’s salary. But here? No, not really.
Well. Life goes on, with both the good and the bad. Life is what it is.